Jerk or Hero? You Decide!

The other day I was texting a friend of mine. I was meaning to say she was my hero. I don't know if my fingers were flying too fast or if my smart phone went dumb, but somehow my phone came up with the word jerk in place of the word hero. Can you imagine doing something nice for someone,  and instead of receiving a thanks, you get called a jerk?

Thankfully I caught and corrected the mistake,  but sometimes I am not that fortunate.  In a flash,  I can say or do something I regret. This is a lesson God has been really trying to teach me. Unfortunately,  I am a very slow learner.

Though there is no autocorrect on our lips, God did provide a tool to help us.  The Bible offers countless scriptures on taming the tongue. I read through a bunch and every single one resonated with me. I know I am not the only one who struggles with keeping my mouth shut. I think that's why God included so many scriptures on this topic. He knew we needed all the help we could get.

So the next time something inappropriate gets ready to fly out of your mouth,  stop and think. Do you want to be a jerk or a hero? Words matter, so choose them wisely.

     Let your conversation be always full of
    grace, seasoned with salt, so that you 
     will know how to answer everyone.
                                                  ~Colossians 4:6

Change of Plans: A Tribute to Melanie

Flashback to the early 90's and hang out with me there while I tell you a story. I was in high school, trapped at work on a Sunday afternoon. When you're 17, and your favorite Sunday evening tradition is going to Pizza Hut with your friends,  being at work is a drag. Sunday nights were a blast, and I looked forward to them every week.

This particular Sunday, my friend was working with me, which helped my mood a ton.  But when we found out our other friends left to go to Pizza Hut before we got off, we were absolutely furious! So what do teenagers do when they get left behind? They make new plans, of course! The two of us traded in the Pizza Hut tradition and treated ourselves to a delicious dinner at a seafood buffet.  That would show 'em! How dare they leave us!

In hindsight,  getting left behind was the very best thing that could have happened to us that night. You see, not too long after that, God decided He needed my friend to come live with Him in heaven. I was a senior in high school, and to date, that was one of the hardest times of my life. It is one of the only times I've ever really questioned my faith. At 18 years old, I could not understand why God would let something like this happen. I still don't understand why it happened, but over the years I've come to trust God. I know His ways are good.

As Isaiah 55:8 tells me, His ways are not my ways and His thoughts are not my thoughts.  I spent several of my teenage years being really angry at God for taking my friend away far too soon.

February is a month I always think about my friend more than usual, because it's the month she celebrates her birthday in heaven. What I didn't realize until the other day was this; God knows every single thing about me and about what will happen to me. He orchestrated everything so even though we felt left out, we were actually given the opportunity of a lifetime to celebrate our friendship.  I will forever remember the laughter we shared around the table that night. But I didn't realize the irony and the beauty of the evening until some 20 years later.

 So as my friend winds up her birthday month celebration in heaven, I will end the month grateful for this opportunity to travel down memory lane. I will think about our fancy dinner, and I will smile. I will tell others about my memory, because life is short. You never know when a sudden change of plans will wind up being your favorite memory.

Hurry Up and Croak

You know what fascinates me? Frogs. Yes, I said frogs. You know why they fascinate me? Because they always sound joyful, and it's really cool how they handle themselves in the winter.  I do not intend for this blog to be a science lesson,  so if don't know anything about frogs in winter,  you should Google it after you finish reading this post.

Here's the thing that really gets me about the frogs. Winters in Virginia are absolutely nuts. It can range from a frigid 12° with snow on the ground to a fabulous, sunny and 75° day all in the same week, and sometimes in a 24 hour period. So where does that leave the poor little frogs?  One day they are asleep, with a slowed heart rate, almost freezing to death. The next day they are croaking a happy song like spring is right around the corner. They must be worn out trying to figure out what to do next.

I don't know about you,  but I am very much like those frogs, worn out trying to complete whatever I should be doing next.  I believe we are living in a time where most people feel this way. Although I try to sing a happy song, by the time the sun sets,  I feel like I could croak, and not necessarily in a sing-songy way.

But that's when I must remember to rest like the frog on a cold, wintry day. God does not intend for us to stay busy every second. Instead we must live out Matthew 11:28, which says, "Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

So here's the lesson we can learn from a frog.  Sleep when you need to, relax when you're tired,  and the rest of the time, croak on, my friend!

Ruby Lou

It was a time at the Bray house this morning!  Our driveway is an absolute mess.  There is a section in the driveway, where we normally turn around, that is so squishy and mushy with melting snow that even Troy's four-wheel drive truck struggled to get through it.  Kathryn wound up having to leave her car (Ruby Lou) stuck in the driveway. Lucky for her, she has a good friend who lives near us, so she didn't have to ride to school with me today!

Do you ever find yourself in a position like Ruby Lou?  I am sure you are not stuck in the snow, but have you ever been stuck spiritually?  I think it happens to everyone at one point or another.  Scripture tells us:

"Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress. Watch your life and doctrine closely.  Persevere in them because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers."  ~1 Timothy 4:15-16 

When you feel stuck, remember to stay the course.  Don't get discouraged because Satan will move in and make everything worse.  Be diligent in reading God's word, praying, and surrounding yourself with Godly friends.  Pretty soon, the Son will shine and you will not be stuck anymore! 

Don't Let Anything Dull Your Sparkle

As I sit here in my pjs under a snuggly blanket and look at the snow covered ground, I cannot help but notice the beauty of the world around me. The once bare, ugly, dull trees are now glistening beautifully with ice crystals as the sun rises above them. But the longer I sit here and  the higher the sun rises in the sky,  the more the ice melts from the treetops. Pretty soon there will be nothing left of the shimmery, sparkly ice and the dull, brown limbs will be exposed again.

But that's just my perception of the immediate situation.  I could choose to step back and shift my focus. I could choose to see the bigger picture of what God has in store for me. Instead of thinking about ugly, brown trees, I can choose to see the beauty God created this very morning.  I can choose to see the blessings right before my eyes.

Sometimes life feels like winter to me. I get discouraged and my thoughts turn negative. I allow other people's thoughts to cloud my judgement. When this happens, my bad attitude prevents me from being who God intends for me to be.  So when life presses down on me, and threatens to dull
my sparkle, I will try to shift my perspective. After all, why would I want to melt away,  when what He wants is for me to shine like the treetops on a cold, wintery day?

"You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead put it on a stand and it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." ~Matthew 5:13-16

You're Not the Boss of Me

I got really mad today! My tendency is to go into the whole long story, but I am going to refrain and just stick to the highlights.  In a nutshell,  here's what happened.

A lab company "misplaced" Caroline's bloodwork. After three weeks of waiting, 90 minutes of phone calls today, and a very disturbing story of what happened,  poor Caroline has to have the bloodwork done over again. Needless to say, I was a very unhappy mama.

While trying to get to the bottom of the issue, I had the perfect opportunity to practice James 1:19:

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen,  slow to speak, and slow to become angry.

Now don't misunderstand me. I am not suggesting I did a good job fulfilling that scripture. I'm just saying I had the fabulous opportunity to practice during three calls to the doctor's office, one phone call to my husband, five calls to the lab, (speaking to multiple people in the company) and one call to my insurance company.

Unfortunately,  things did not end as I had hoped.  As it turns out, my insurance company is the boss of me. They would not allow me to take Caroline to her doctor's office to have the blood redrawn. Instead they are forcing me to use the same company that messed up. Here's the good news, though.  My God is the boss of everyone. He forgives people when they mess up. So tomorrow, we will have a do- over. I will give the lab another opportunity to correctly do their job, and God will give me another opportunity to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. I sure am glad God is my Boss and He is in charge of me!

Friendship

Lately I've been thinking a lot about this business of friendship.  I love how God brings friends to us just when we need them the most. Sometimes we remain friends forever, and other times the friendship is just for a season. But what qualities should we look for in a friend?

Often we put too much pressure on our friends, which is so unfair and can leave us feeling disappointed. So how do we avoid being disappointed in our friends? I think the answer is to keep God at the center of every friendship. Everyone knows what a friend is, but maybe we should talk about what a friend is not.

1. A friend is not someone who is always there for you. I mean think about it. I don't know about you, but I am a needy girl. It's not fair for me to expect my friends to always be there. Always is a very big word. The only person I know who is ALWAYS there for us is God.

2. A friend is not someone who always supports what we do. We're all human,  and sometimes we really mess things up.  I would much rather have a truthful friend, who calls me out when I'm wrong, than one who is always justifying my actions.  I want a friend who holds me accountable and pushes me to be more like Jesus.

3. A friend is not someone who always says, "Everything is going to be fine."  Life is hard, and it brings all kinds of struggles. Some situations are just not "fine." A true friend directs our attention back to God, encouraging us to lean on Him instead of getting through struggles leaning solely on our friends.

So as you travel this path of life, be sure to thank God for the friends He has placed in your life. But also remember to put your hope in God, not in your friends.   Isaiah 40:31 says, "but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."