From One Princess to Another

For the past six weeks, I feel like a black cloud is following me around.  Some of the things have been Facebook worthy, and some have been kept just among my family. None of the things have been tragic or earth shattering, but it's certainly been enough to get a sister down. For a while, I accidentally allowed the storm clouds to rain on me, but then some friends swept in, encouraged my heart, and set my feet back on a positive path.

One of the best pieces of advice I've ever received is to look for the blessing in every situation. This concept is great in theory, but when you're in the trenches, sometimes it's hard to see the silver lining. But that's why God blesses us with friends. When I am feeling discouraged He always places someone in my path to offer a kind word or deed at exactly the perfect moment. My true friends always remind me to refocus and to thank God for my many blessings. Shifting my thoughts from my troubles to my blessings gives me the courage and energy to move forward.

It's easy to get caught up in the negativity surrounding us. The world would have us believe our situations can be hopeless. But we must always remember we have a Father in heaven who loves us and is always looking out for our best interest, even when life feels hard. The bible tells us in 1 John 3:1, "See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!..."   So if you are feeling a little overwhelmed, remember you are a child of the King. This makes you a princes, so straighten your crown, put a smile on your face, and move on to brighter days ahead!

Making the Most of the Lasts

When the alarm clock sounds tomorrow, the Bray family begins a series of "lasts." Today is Senior Year Eve. Tomorrow my oldest baby girl wakes up to begin her "last" first day of  high school. I realize she will have other first days of school, but I won't be there to take the pictures. There is no need to panic though, because we've had the opportunity to practice 12 other first days of school. After tomorrow's first, she will be a professional and ready to tackle all the other first days on her own.

The pressure is intense. I have one more year to impart as much knowledge on her as I can, and then I must let her fly. A wise friend recently told me parents shouldn't be sad in this season of life. Instead we should rejoice because our children have been in training all their lives and are now ready to go practice all we have taught them.  This year, as we go through these series of "lasts" together, we will seize opportunities and celebrate adventures. We will make memories and capture them on film and in our hearts.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, " 'For I know the plans I have for you' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.' " So I will rest in this promise as I cheer from the sidelines while Kathryn makes the most of senior year. I will treasure these "last" childhood memories and I will be excited to see what God has in store for her. But in the meantime, if you see me at a school or church event wiping tears, I am not sad. I am soaking in memories so hard they are falling out of my eyes.

Throw Out a Life Jacket and Hang On

This last month of motherhood has been extremely difficult for me. It has brought unexpected challenges for not only me, but also my entire family. In our "tell all" society, where WAY too much information is available at our finger tips, the Bray family elected not to share our struggles with the world. Most of our closest friends aren't even aware of what this last month held for us.

I don't write this post for sympathy or to try to make you guess or gossip about horrible things happening to us. Really the things we went through this last month aren't even difficult when you put everything in perspective. I do, however, write this blog so we can remind each other we are all fighting battles most of the world doesn't realize. Maybe the grumpy cashier hasn't slept for weeks because of something heavy on her mind. Maybe your co-worker got some bad news, but was asked not to share it with anyone else, which is a heavy burden to bear alone. Maybe your neighbor is in a tough spot and handling life the best he can.  How come when we know someone is having a hard time we are supportive and understanding, but when we aren't aware, we judge them and label them as being ugly or grumpy?

As I reflect on the events of the past month, many images run through my mind. Immediately my brain fills with negative thoughts about how I wish I had been the strong mom who didn't break down in tears or snap at my family or those I love. But then God reminds me of this verse from Isaiah 43:2, which says, "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze."  What incredible comfort to know that even when I feel like I'm drowning or on fire I am not stuck in the situation. God promises me these hard situations will pass, and I will emerge on the other side and be just fine.

Maybe instead of remembering myself as a raving lunitic for the past month  I should try to think about the times I nailed the situation and handled things like a champ. Because there have been some championship moments! And as the black cloud lifts and dissipates, maybe I should think of myself as the mama who walked through fire and didn't get burned. That's a pretty cool trick, don't you think?

Next time I encounter someone who seems out of sorts, hopefully instead of talking bad about them, I will pause and remember they may be in a life situation where they feel like they are drowning. Let's throw each other life jackets as we walk through the waters of life together.

Buy a Pack of Toilet Paper and Dump a Bucket of Iced Water on Your Head

Turn on the news or open social media and in a few seconds you'll be so discouraged you won't know what to do. Suicide rates are at an all-time high and "peaceful" protests are leaving people dead in the streets. Even the very ones who are supposed to be protecting us have become innocent targets. I don't want to live in a world full of hate and fear, but apparently I do. It seems the whole world has gone nuts.

Speaking of nuts, let me tell you a funny story with an amazing ending. It all started with a friendly competition between two adult Sunday School classes. None of the details are important, except to know we were collecting items for local food banks and shelters in our area. The competition was fierce. Three classmates from the winning class would dump a bucket of iced water on the teacher and two students from the losing class. And so for over a week, both of the classes went crazy buying items for those in need.

I have to admit, the friendly smack talk between the classes was a refreshing break from the nightly news and a great distraction from the madness of the world. Comments like, "Wednesday we go to battle" really meant, "I sure do hope we collect a ton of stuff for the local shelters." Finally the big night arrived and an official judge counted the items and announced the winner. The competition took an unexpected twist at the end, and things didn't go exactly as I planned!

But things did go exactly as God planned. While I was thawing out and laughing at all the fun we had, God was preparing to teach me a lesson. One of the shelters where the goods were delivered was down to their very last pack of toilet paper. I don't know how that strikes you, but it pulls my heart strings. I can't imagine being a mama on the run, trying to protect my children, and not being able to provide them with toilet paper. Toilet paper seems like such a small thing, and I guess it isn't news worthy.  But I can't help but wonder what our world would be like if the news was filled with stories about human beings loving and helping one another, instead of all the horrific stories they choose to share.

News channels usually don't choose to air good news, so it's our responsibility to take up their slack. The bible says in 1 John 1:5-7, "This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the       darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin."  We live in a dark world, and it gets darker by the day. If we are not careful, the darkness will surround us. Now, more than ever, we need to be the light for others around us.  Look for those who need help and strive to be a blessing to someone. If that means getting three buckets of iced water dumped on your head, so be it, because at the end of the day, we are all winners if we put our faith in God and love one another deeply.

Relationship Goals

People watching.  It's what you do on the beach. To the right we have The Screamers. Every so often one of them has a fit and just goes off the deep end yelling.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not judging them.  They had nine fairly small children with them.  It's not easy keeping small children safe and happy at the beach. I guess sometimes we all just lose it! Also to the right we have Mr Ugly Pants.  He's being rude to everyone around him. Maybe he's just having a bad day. To the left we have the Photogenic Family. They are happy enough,  and capturing every single moment on camera.

I am certain the people around us are judging our family as well. I don't know what they are saying,  and I don't really care. We are happy and enjoying ourselves.  But none of us can help but notice the old couple sitting by the water's edge. They must be near 90 and everyone around is pointing and smiling.  They sit side by side, staring offshore, gazing into the beautiful Atlantic Ocean. We can't hear what they're saying,  but you can tell by their body language they are very content.

As the day draws to a close and it's time to leave, they gather up their chairs and put them in a white cart with very huge, orange tires. Then they turn, both grab hold of the handle, and begin making the trek up the sand dune. Halfway up, they stop and rest together before lugging their stuff the rest of the way up the dune. I don't know how far they had to travel, but it didn't matter,  because they were taking the journey together.

I know I am blessed to have Troy as my husband. I know over the years, we have been like all the people we've seen on the beach this week. Sometimes we yell and are rude, and sometimes we're happy and take pictures.  Regardless, we are in this adventure together for life. When we are old, I know we will sit by the sea and talk about how great life has been and how much we love our kids and our family. And then when we're tired, we will help each other drag our junk up the sand dune and go home. Because at the end of the day, there's no where else I'd rather be.

Flipper

This morning we had the joy of observing bottlenose dolphins frolic in the Atlantic Ocean. These graceful creatures break the surface of the water in a gliding motion, and then dive back down again, totally disappearing in the ocean's abyss. Every once in a while, their whole body erupts from the ocean before disappearing again.

 Dolphins are very social creatures. They travel in pods anywhere from four to 40. They communicate underwater by making sounds,  but also by slapping their tails on top of the water.  I know all this thanks to my good friend Google, and from my experience of growing up on the water in Mathews, Va. What I would love to know, which Google can't tell me, is what they were saying to each other with the tail slap.

Human slaps often mean anger, but these dolphins were rambunctious and playful.  They would leap out of the water, and just before they dove in again,  they would slap their tail flat on the water's surface. The thud could be heard from the shoreline,  and water would shoot up and cascade down again. It was almost as if they were beckoning onlookers,  "Come play with us! The water is crisp and we're having a great day!"

It never really occurred to me to add "watch dolphins slap the water with their tails" to my bucket list,  but thankfully God thought it would be a good one for today, so He added it for me. I've seen dolphins millions of times, but the joy they bring never gets old. The smell of salt air, the sound of crashing waves, the feel of sand between the toes, the peaceful wind,  and the blazing sun makes Nags Head, NC a wonder. Though it didn't make one of the top seven natural wonders of the world,  it should have. Great job, God, in creating this small slice of heaven!

So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living thing with which the water teems and that moves about in it, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. -Genesis 1:21

Off We Go, Into the Wild Blue Yonder!

As the plane taxied down the runway, the anxiety within me heightened. Behind me sat 28 middle schoolers, many who had never flown before. I wasn't sure what I would do if one of them started freaking out. The engines screamed as we began to lift into the air. As we zoomed toward the clouds  I glanced behind me to be sure everything was under control. That's when I noticed it. The sweet, child-like faith of the students.

They were scared, and they were freaking out, only not in the screaming, hysterical way I had imagined. Instead they had linked arms with the person beside them. Some had even stretched across the aisle to hold hands. No one made fun of those who were scared,  but instead they offered words of encouragement to one another.

Soon we broke through the clouds and into the great beyond. The pilot came on and asked everyone to remain seated and buckled because storms were raging below us. It's odd to think it can be wildly storming under the clouds, but perfectly sunny above them.

We would be wise to apply the lessons of flying to our lives.  We live in a world full of things that scare us. Sometimes it seems the whole world has gone nuts. Tragedies surround us, people are outraged,  and cruelty commonly flies out of people's mouths. What if, instead of joining in the chaos, we just fasten our seat belts,  hold hands with one another,  and reassure those we love everything is going to turn out alright. Today I challenge you. Don't be one who freaks out and participates in the violent storms. Instead be an umbrella for others and show them the sunlight just beyond the clouds.