As we approached the playground where my group would be working, I immediately starting forming opinions of the people who lived in this neighborhood and the lives they must lead. And my eyes told me my opinions were correct. I saw adults who should be working, but they were just hanging out in the neighborhood doing nothing. There was fighting in the streets and all kinds of strange, questionable activities happening all around us. I saw kids coming and going, with no adult supervision. They were sent to the playground with nothing to eat and nothing to drink, and probably no one even knew where they were. After one hour at the playground, all of my suspicions were confirmed. The neighborhood bully was actively tormenting the other kids,and the only mother at the playground sat off to herself and wouldn't interact with anyone. Yep, I clearly had it all figured out.
But then I took time to chat with that mother who sat alone. I asked God to help me connect with her, and that is exactly what He did. But God did way more than that. He also used that mother to change me. We wound up sitting under a shade tree and talking all afternoon. In that time we spent together, I got way more information than I knew how to handle.
She explained to me how she had grown up in the projects and was struggling to break free from the life she had always known. She desperately wanted to show her daughter a new way of life, but she didn't have the means to get out. She shared stories about things that happened in her neighborhood, and the things she said absolutely terrified me. I felt like I couldn't even relate to anything she was saying. Yet all the while, I was touched by her passion for life, and by the way she encouraged the children on the playground to be kind and to react in love to all situations rather than anger.
As the afternoon wore on, she shared part of her life story with me, and God opened my eyes and showed me we were actually not all that different. We both were mamas and we both loved our children very much. We both loved Jesus, and we both wanted what was best for our children. Finding that common bond allowed me to see her in a different light. I no longer wanted to judge her, but I wanted to love her.
At first I was a little ashamed at my negative reaction to the people in that neighborhood, but then I remembered God doesn't judge me the way I judge others. He extends grace to me, and He asks me to extend that same grace to others. No, our problems are not the same, but we all have problems. We are all broken in one way or another, and we are all in need of a Savior. But we serve a God who loves us, and He wants us to love others in return.
Unfortunately, I am very good at judging others,which is why I am so thankful for the beautiful experience I had in KY. Life is a journey, and as we travel, we must strive to be more like Jesus. Our life experiences shape us, and we always have the choice to either learn from our mistakes or just move onward. I am sure my judging problem is far from over, but with God's help maybe I will put my time and effort into getting to know the people around me rather than judging them.
