Throw Out a Life Jacket and Hang On

This last month of motherhood has been extremely difficult for me. It has brought unexpected challenges for not only me, but also my entire family. In our "tell all" society, where WAY too much information is available at our finger tips, the Bray family elected not to share our struggles with the world. Most of our closest friends aren't even aware of what this last month held for us.

I don't write this post for sympathy or to try to make you guess or gossip about horrible things happening to us. Really the things we went through this last month aren't even difficult when you put everything in perspective. I do, however, write this blog so we can remind each other we are all fighting battles most of the world doesn't realize. Maybe the grumpy cashier hasn't slept for weeks because of something heavy on her mind. Maybe your co-worker got some bad news, but was asked not to share it with anyone else, which is a heavy burden to bear alone. Maybe your neighbor is in a tough spot and handling life the best he can.  How come when we know someone is having a hard time we are supportive and understanding, but when we aren't aware, we judge them and label them as being ugly or grumpy?

As I reflect on the events of the past month, many images run through my mind. Immediately my brain fills with negative thoughts about how I wish I had been the strong mom who didn't break down in tears or snap at my family or those I love. But then God reminds me of this verse from Isaiah 43:2, which says, "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze."  What incredible comfort to know that even when I feel like I'm drowning or on fire I am not stuck in the situation. God promises me these hard situations will pass, and I will emerge on the other side and be just fine.

Maybe instead of remembering myself as a raving lunitic for the past month  I should try to think about the times I nailed the situation and handled things like a champ. Because there have been some championship moments! And as the black cloud lifts and dissipates, maybe I should think of myself as the mama who walked through fire and didn't get burned. That's a pretty cool trick, don't you think?

Next time I encounter someone who seems out of sorts, hopefully instead of talking bad about them, I will pause and remember they may be in a life situation where they feel like they are drowning. Let's throw each other life jackets as we walk through the waters of life together.