Instead of Giving Up, Form a Plan, and Then Adapt!

I have a love/hate relationship with the sport of running.  I probably hate more things about it than I love,  but one thing I do love about it are the life lessons I learn,  especially in a race-type situation.  Today I ran the Chick-fil-A 10k,  and as always,  my goal was to cross the finish line without dying, and to run the whole time without stopping. Clearly I lived; it was the "run the whole time" part where I struggled a tiny bit.  Though I only reached part of my goal, my experience along the path made me the most successful!

The trail was a beautiful, windy path with a scenic view of ponds, lovely homes, and the river. Doesn't that sound tranquil? Well it wasn't!  That beautiful trail was also very hilly. Those "rolling hills" kicked my butt early on in the race.  I tried hard to focus on the beauty of my surroundings and to be thankful for the lovely weather. This plan worked in taking my mind off my troubles, but only for a while.  

Pretty soon the path  changed. We ran out of the beauty and into a place where the sun was beating down on us.  I caught a view of Jefferson Avenue,  and there is nothing beautiful about that! I also found myself dog-tired, very hot, and thirsty. I tried to shift my focus to the people around me. There were runners  of varying ages, and most didn't seem like they were as near death as I felt, so I decided to suck it up and keep running.  I truly believe 90% of running is mental anyway, so the "don't stop now plan" kept me pushing toward my goal for a bit longer. 

My next plan,  now about 2 mIles in, was to find someone running my pace and just stick with them. This took awhile because everyone around me was either too fast or too slow. Finally,  I spotted a girl who was running a bit faster than I was. I caught up to her and decided I could hang for a while.  We ran along in silence for a bit, but then we started chatting.  After a few minutes,  she said, "You don't recognize me, do you?" I was embarrassed to say I didn't. In my defense,  I was in a near death state state of mind, and I hadn't seen this girl in years.  It turns out, she grew up in Mathews! I think there were over 4,000 people at this event. What are the odds God would pair me up with a familiar face? 

We didn't talk a ton, because I couldn't hardly breathe,  but what an amazing time to be able to catch up with someone I probably haven't seen in 20 years.  We ran several miles together, but around mile four,  our paces varied and I found myself running my own race again.

By now, I was totally exhausted. Much of the last part of the race was uphill so I made the tough decision to walk. At first I was mad at myself for "quitting" but then I decided I wasn't a quiter, I was an adapter. I have never run hills, so I did what I needed to do to finish the race alive. I walked and ran mile five, praying the finish line would soon appear.

Another reason I love this sport is because runners are so kind. I can't tell you the number of total strangers who passed me offering encouraging words and trying to keep me running.  Right at the six mile mark, my friend caught up with me and said, "We've got .2 miles left. Let's finish this thing strong." And so we did!  I didn't die, my time was pretty good,  and God reminded me that when things are difficult,  I need to take my focus off myself,  search for a friend, and keep getting it. Today,  I ran the race marked out for me. It was tough, but was good. Do you want to know what I love best about running? The finish line. It's a beautiful sight!

The Waiting Game and How to Win

As I type this,  I am in a teeny, tiny doctor's office waiting room.  It's very hot in here, and there are no other people around me. I have to keep telling myself the walls aren't actually closing in on me, even though it feels like they might be. The T.V. is on, but the volume is so low I can't even hear it.  I am going to be here a while. I didn't bring anything to read, and there's really nothing to do except wait.

Can you tell I'm a terrible waiter? My brain is filled with thoughts about millions of things I could or should be doing. But instead I'm just sitting here doing nothing but waiting.  Google says the average person spends somewhere between 45 and 62 minutes a day waiting.  Oh the things I could accomplish at home if I had 62 uninterrupted minutes!

But waiting doesn't always look like sitting around doing nothing.  Sometimes waiting can be emotional or painful. It can also be exciting, if you're waiting for something good.  Waiting comes in all forms and fashions. Perhaps we are waiting for company to arrive, or someone who's sick to get well.  Maybe we're waiting for test results or waiting for a break. We could be waiting for someone to keep a promise or stop breaking our hearts.

No matter what we are waiting for, we have these words of encouragement from Psalm 33:20. "We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help and our shield." Do you hear the good news packed in that verse? Hope. Like I always say, "If ya ain't got hope,  ya ain't got nothin!" But if hope isn't enough,  the verse also says God is our help and our shield.  No matter what you're waiting for, isn't it comforting to think God is helping you?  And if the waiting seems to be more than you can bear, know the Shield will protect you while you wait. So take heart my friend, and trust God with whatever is making you wait. There just might be a blessing "waiting" on the other side!

A Walk to Remember: Here's to the MHS Class of 2016

Today the Mathews High School class of 2016 put on their caps and gowns and marched the halls of Lee-Jackson Elementary School and Thomas Hunter Middle School. To say it was a touching, amazing experience is a drastic understatement. But here's the thing. I got to see the entire scene unfold from multiple perspectives.  Let me explain.

I spent most of the day working at the high school.  I got to see the hustle and bustle of the seniors getting dressed up and snapping pictures with their friends. I got to see the smiles on their faces and hear the excitement in their voices as they prepared to board the school bus, most of them for their very last time.

Then I went to Lee-Jackson, and found a spot to watch the seniors march through the school.  The halls were lined with small children eagerly anticipating the arrival of the seniors. They clapped, cheered, and chanted "MHS" as they waited.  When the seniors finally arrived,  the students cheered wildly and high-fived the graduates.  There is just something so sweet about watching an event through the eyes of a child. But at the same time, I was watching the event unfold as a former teacher of many of the marching seniors. Memories flooded my mind, and I had to fight back tears as those babies walked past me, now all grown up and ready to make their way into the real world.  

Next I walked to the middle school.  The graduates were ahead of me, marching one step closer to their future. Pomp and Circumstance was blaring over the PA system, but over the music I could hear students talking about how "cool" such-and-such looked in the cap and gown. I also heard one student say, "That was awesome!" Though middle school kids view life very differently than the rest of the world, I couldn't agree more. It was an awesomely cool experience! 

As quickly as they came, they exited the building and headed back to the high school to finish out their day.  This was the first time this type of senior march was done in Mathews, and I know it won't be the last. 

My story doesn't end here. I had to go back to MHS to finish up some work, so I got to see the seniors after the march.  For some it wasn't a paricularly memorable time, because they didn't grow up in Mathews.  But for those who did, I think it was a day they'll never forget. To walk the halls of the place that made them who they are was bittersweet, and to see teachers who loved them was a sentimental moment.

In a few short weeks,  they will put on their caps and gowns for the very last time as they walk across the stage to get their diplomas. It is time for them to go. But no matter where life takes them,  they will always be a part of the Mathews High School Class of 2016. Congratulations guys! Now go do great things!

Shout Out to My MM Peeps!

I write this post tonight with my heart so full it could burst! About a year and a half ago,  God connected me with a group of people who touched my heart and changed my life forever.  When we first came together, some of us didn't even know each other. But it didn't take us long to realize we all loved Jesus, and we were all longing to be His hands and feet.  And so we became the Mission Minded Sunday School Class.

We have spent many hours doing life together. We laugh, we cry, we learn, and we love. Though they think I am their teacher,  they are the ones who teach me. Week after week, they come to Sunday School, and they show me what it means to be a good friend.  Their honest, open conversation teaches me to be vulnerable, because real friends don't judge one another.  None of us are perfect,  but we know God isn't finished with us yet.  So we choose to come together each week to learn about God and what he has in store for us.

Hebrews 10:24-25 says, "And let us consider how we may spur one another toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together,  as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another - and all the more as you see the Day approaching."

If you do not have a church family, I strongly urge you to search for one, or come join ours.  God intends for us to be in fellowship with one another.  Sometimes that means feeding the homeless, or helping people in the community. Other times it means acting crazy and laughing your head off trying to take a group photo on a bounce house sliding board.  Either way, what a blessing my Sunday School class is to me!

Healing is Possible

Perspective is a powerful thing. It can be as different as day and night.  It can be the difference between laughter and tears. It has the ability to make or break a situation. It can even destroy relationships.  But why do we allow perspective to have so much control in our lives?

I think one reason for this is because, by nature, we are very selfish creatures.  We want things to go a certain way, and we want others around us to agree with our thoughts and actions. But in reality,  this mentality can be very dangerous.  It leaves our thoughts jaded, and we run the risk of hurting others in the process of getting people on our side.

Stop and think for a second.  Do you have broken relationships with family and/or friends?  I think many of us do. Broken relationships are extremely painful, especially if you feel you are not at fault or if the other person truly doesn't want to mend fences.  

This is a tough topic for me to write about,  because I find myself right smack in the middle of several situations just like the ones mentioned above. It's so difficult to know when to keep trying and when to walk away. After all, how many times can a person be hurt and then walk back into the same situation to be hurt again? The saddest part for me is I can't fix the relationships.

 But that doesn't mean I am powerless. There are actions I can take.  I can allow myself to see the other persons perspective,  so my heart doesn't become hard toward them. I can check my attitude to be sure I am not holding a grudge. I can choose to be kind instead of being bitter. I can choose to pray for the one who has hurt or saddened me. 

Will this be easy? No. Will this repair the broken relationships?  Maybe. Or maybe not. But that's not up to me, it's up to God. We need to stop allowing the devil to mess with our minds because he's the one making us think the situation is hopeless. We need to stop giving perspective, ours or someone else's, so much power.  Matthew 19:26 states, "Jesus looked at them and said,  'With man this is impossible,  but with God all things are possible.'" So hang in there, my friends, and know everything will turn out in the end.

I Should Win an Oscar for That!

Lately I have been thinking about how our words and actions affect the people around us. I know you will find this shocking,  but I have been know to overreact a time or two! Shocking, right?

Each and every day, we are put into situations we'd rather not experience. Then we are forced to react to these situations with one of two choices.  We will either react in a positive or a negative way. But what if the situation is so shocking you can't find the strength to be positive or negative?  Perhaps there is a third choice, and maybe this is the most critical choice of all. Maybe we need to react with silence.

I am very, very bad at choice number three. Let me give you some examples from the past 24 hours.  A dear friend is awaiting test results that could change her life forever. I want to fix it, to tell her it's all fine. But the reality is it might not be fine. My job is to pray for her.  My daughter told me about something shocking that happened at school.  She told me because she trusts me. It's my job to guide and teach her as she makes her way through life. I can't do that job if I'm flipping out.  A situation came up at work that really didn't make me happy.  My instinct was to explain how the plan wouldn't work.  But in reality some things are out of my control, and they affect more than just me. I want to be one who helps solve problems,  not one who throws a fit when things don't go my way.

James 1:19 says, "My dear brothers and sisters,  take note of this. Everyone should be quick to listen,  slow to speak,  and slow to become angry." God was pretty smart when He inspired James to write these words. If I'm able to apply this scripture to my life, then it let's me off the hook. I don't have to solve any of these problems I heard about today,  because God will handle each one according to His will. All I have to do is lend a listening ear to those around me, and leave the rest to God.

When I control my shock, anger, grief, or whatever negative emotion bubbles to the surface, I shouldn't say, "I deserve an Oscar for the way I handled that situation." Yes, I actually made that statement to someone today. Even if I did handle a situation well, the thought should remain in my head and not come out of my mouth. My flippant words do NOT show the person James was talking about who is slow to speak.

Tonight I will put my head on my pillow and thank God for sending people my way who are willing to share shocking news with me. I will ask Him to help me be quick to listen and slow to speak. Then I will wake up tomorrow thankful for another day to get it right.

A Splash of Joy: A Tribute to Aunt Naomi

Today we attended a celebration of life for Aunt Naomi, Troy's great aunt, who went to be with Jesus on Monday.  The service was beautiful, and the preacher did an exceptional job of capturing her spunk and love of life.

Aunt Naomi was Grandma Marie's sister, and you all know how much I loved that lady!  Marie and Naomi were a lot alike.  They were both very vocal,  extremely competitive, and always up for an adventure!

Once when Kathryn was a baby, Aunt Naomi put a spell on her. She came for a visit, and as she was leaving she said,  "Now Kathryn, you be a good baby girl and sleep through the night for your mama and daddy." Don't you know that was the first time Kathryn slept though the night?  She was only a couple of months old and she's been sleeping through the night ever since! I remember after Caroline was born I couldn't wait for Aunt Naomi to meet her because I was a tired mama, and I just knew Aunt Naomi could make her sleep.

I keep thinking how hard it must have been for the preacher to deliver the message today. He has known Aunt Naomi for a long time. They were on the same bowling league, and they played golf together.  Did I mention earlier she was competitive?  She loved to beat him and then brag about it. As the preacher said, "She was a hoot!" I hope when I'm 82 I am as active as she was!

He also said when she walked into the room, she brought the party with her. She certainly made an impact on people, which was evident by the huge number of family and friends who attended her service today. I heard her son say two of the nurses who cared for her came. I wonder if Aunt Naomi knew she made such an impact on those ladies.  Then again, I guess none of us truly understands how our words and actions affect another.

The Bray fam spent the ride home reminiscing about Aunt Naomi and Grandma Marie. Memories are a beautiful gift from God. Those two ladies taught us so much about life and love.

One day we will all meet our Maker, and we must be prepared to give an account for our actions. I'm not sure if Aunt Naomi can beat Jesus bowling, but I'm sure she will try!  I'm also sure when she entered Heaven He said, "Well done, good and faithful servant."